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Claw Money, the rambunctiously intoxicating, unflaggingly energetic 38-year-old graffiti queen of NYC, took time out from planning her wedding, designing her line (a collection of sunglasses and vintage scarf hoodies), editing fashion at Swindle magazine and promoting her new book, Bombshell: The Life and Crimes of Claw Money ($26, amazon.com), to take us through the Canal Street jungle. One of the first to bomb a symbol rather than a name, the iconic three-talon claw now proudly bares itself on T-shirts, tote bags and matchbooks. As such, she seemed like the perfect guide for searching out grills, gem-encrusted pendants, fake Fendi and everything in between. Shutting down nagging salespeople (“Let’s see it!” she yelled at an imposter-bag dealer, followed by a fast “No thanks!”), she moved so quickly we could barely keep up.
Photos: Canal Plastics (left); Ann's Jewelry (right)

Canal Plastics Center
A fanatic collector, Claw fell hard for these graphic charms ($1 each). She’s shopped at this Canal Street institution for years. “My apartment is walled with silver paper from here, and I have millions of their baby disco balls—I mean, everyone needs a little disco in their life, right?” 345 Canal St at Greene St (212-925-1666)

Shop on Canal Inc.
“Since all those Murray Hill bitches took over skulls, what’s a punk girl supposed to do?!?” We bought some skinny red-skull suspenders anyway, and picked up this sweet heart-and-key charm necklace ($10). She cooed over some Hello Kitty cell-phone charms, too. 369 Canal St between West Broadway and Wooster St (212-925-3288)

Ann’s Jewelry
“Obviously I’ve got the real things, but sometimes you just gotta fake it till you make it.” Cop a little Claw style with these lightweight “bamboo” hoops ($5). Claw’s (probably accurate) opinion of the more upscale jewelry “malls” on Canal Street: “It’s probably three-karat gold rather than, you know, something you’d find a little farther uptown.” 361 Canal St at Wooster St (917-916-6558)

Mini Mall
Ever the master marketer, Claw had the saleslady enter claw money into the Jenny Holzer–like text-crawl belt buckle ($20). You can punch in an entire phrase that will loop in red digital letters. Only on Canal Street, kids, only on Canal Street. 363 Canal St between West Broadway and Wooster St (917-286-7602)